Over the past couple of days I have really been struggling with many things.. I am depressed and no one really seems to care. I keep things hidden because no matter what I do its always the same thing
” You bring this on your self.”
” You are a bad person”
“You need to loose weight”
“You need to stop being such a baby”
“It’s all your fault Kris is the way she is”
“You made her this way”
So why bother telling anyone anything if all you do is get blamed for everything no matter what. I have learned that you are not supposed to regret the choices you make in life. You should learn from them. Yes, I never regret any of my choices and I have learned alot from things.
My struggles with all of that has been making me rethink the blog and its entirety! I mean granted the name and domain was given to me by a dear friend of mine so i just went with it and made it my own. I have been struggling with do I start something new that is my own or just continue this one.. I am torn i really am.. For years i have used Standing Still and now this. So its like what do i do..
The struggles at home are reflecting heavily on my blog choices.
Well today marks the second day to the New Year and I am not sure how I am liking it so far. I mean the 1st of the year was OK, but today we got an unexpected call that no one really wants to here, the partners mother passed away this morning and it was a complete shock to us all. I mean complete shock. I think once the funeral is done and over with things will kind of get better and semi easier., though who knows really.. Its a New Year and a new Start!
Other than that 2020 promises to be a good year. Well we can hope so anyway. I am sure I will still have my challenges this year as I did last but that is about it.. No resolutions that are never really kept anyway. I do not see the point.. Yes, I always say i am going to blog more but i have not see that happen yet! I say that i am going to do this and that and nothing has happened yet! So no resolutions. Just see how the year goes and hopefully it is a good one!
Well, It took me a bit to get back to this post and finish it. Alot has happened over the 6 days. My Partners birth mom passed away unexpectedly and its been a mess here. Going through her things now and the funeral. I just want to scream. I can not seem to catch a break honestly. I am over ran! Though I am hoping that once things settle down I will be able to sit and write more, though who knows.. Well I better get this posted.. Will be back soon with an update!
Hello December, You come with ice which is most definitely not welcomed but it is part of who you are! I hope you are an eventful month, though knowing my luck you will not be. It marks yet another month at the end of the year as we are starting a new year soon! So far you have been fairly good. I managed to actually get a desk, so I have that set the way i want it and plenty of room to move around now! I am happy about that though. I just hope the month gets better than worse.
So we are sitting here near the end of December and things have gotten semi better but not as much as I would hope.. It has been hectic but i am getting through it.
So maybe In January a better year with more writing .We will see.. See you in January!
My biggest Pet Peeves seems to be a bit of a longer list because it is several things that drive my up the wall.
- Saying you understand what it is like being away from your children when you have no kids at all. That is the biggest one right there.
- People saying things that you supposedly said and never did!
- Those who walk right into you because they are to busy texting and not paying attention to anything else.
- People going through your personal things.
- Misspelled words just because you do not pay attention to what you are typing.
Those are just a few things that bother me, but the list is way longer than that lol. I just do not want to bore you! I will see you tomorrow with another post as I play catch up!
What are some songs that I currently love. Well that one is a bit difficult because I have alot of songs that are my favorite! I am a music person, so I pretty much listen to anything and everything! Music has always been a passion of mine. Though here are links to a few songs that I do like and can listen to them over and over again without getting tired of them!
Ed Sheeran – Thinking out Loud
Justin Timberlake – Mirrors
Backstreet Boys – No Place
AJ McLean – Boy and a Man
Those are just a few of my favorite songs that I love, but I do have a lot more. The list can go on and on but I figure I will leave it with those. If their is a song you think I should listen to that I might like. Please feel free to drop the link in the comments and i will listen to it and tell you what I think of it..
I have a few favorite quotes. Listed below are a few of my favorite! They are so true and I relate to them all to well.
“Never let anyone tell you who you can be. Be Yourself Always ”
“Don’t let Yesterday use up to much of Today!”
“Live life to the fullest, for the future is scarce.” – Nick Carter
“I have no regrets. I believe you have to go through everything to grow and learn.” ~ A. J. McLean
“Believe in yourself.reach down inside. The love you found will set you free. Believe in yourself. You would come alive. Have faith in what you do. You’ll make it through” ~ Joey McIntyre
“Don’t ever let anyone else write your story for you.” ~ Nick Carter
“You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.” ~ Bindi Irwin
For Day 1 – I decided I wanted to Combine a few of them. 20 facts about me, Photo of me and the Behind the blog name! This way It is more of an introduction to the blog and myself at the same time!
20 Facts about me :
– I am a Divorced, though remarried Mother of 3.
– I am a babygirl – Though Alot of you do not know what that means. I will explain that in another post at a later time!
– I believe that love is not about Gender. Love is Love No matter what Gender you dentify with!
– I generally keep to my self. I have a few friends that I will talk to but that is it. I am not a social butterfly that I once was! I blame alot on that though – I will explain that too!
– I am a huge Backstreet Boys Fan – YES STILL!
– I love to read. Reading has always been a passion of mine!
-I love writing. I have written poems and a few short stories. No they have never been published but I have had poems published!
– I have been blogging for a while now and I absolutely love it!
– I am a PC-Gamer!
– I am a Coffee-addict
– Gummy Bears are my favorite!
– I love to color and still do!
– I have alot of stuffed animals.
– I collect Frogs!
– I have 7 tattoos and want more
– I am a Graphic Designer
– I love taking pictures!
– Halloween is my Favorite Time of the Year!
– The Nightmare before Christmas is one of my favorite movies!
– I like watching Scary Movies!
That is 20 fun facts about me.. Now to the reason behind the name of the blog
The way I got the name for the blog is simple. One of my best friends has the domain first and she started a new one so she gave this one to me. I blogged under several different names in the past and honestly A few I loved the names! Though I have been blogging for about 14 years now and love it! For the past 3 years I have blogged under Standing Still and when she gave me this one the name just stuck. A few of my closest friends say the name suits me better! This blog is my journey through depression, divorce and starting over! Though everything else has been threw in the mix but it works! Well that is me and the blog in a nutshell.. I hope you will join me tomorrow!