You can’t put a price tag on love or can you? That is the one thing that is on my mind today! Why, the reasoning is very simple.. My birthday is next month and I was thinking about what I wanted.. I do not ask for much on my birthday simple reasons I never get it.. The first thing that came to mind is something I have wanted to do for a while now.. A simple tattoo on my shoulder blade that says Always & Forever. That came to a quick no, because her family does not believe in tattoos. They are the work of the devil and so forth. I have 7 and would I go as far as regretting my tattoos no way in hell.. So thinking about it something else that came to mind is a New Barnes and Nobles Nook because the one I have died and I love reading.. I was told when I get the money and thinking to my self how the hell is that ever going to happen because I have no job because I stay here and clean the house and take care of every one else.. You would think that someone who supposedly loves you and appreciates everything that you do for them as much as she claims she does would spend a little bit on money on the person you care about.. I was sadly mistaken. So it seems a price tag has been put on love.. Hell I have told her for months that I need a pedicure because my heals are getting so bad that it hurts to walk, that has not happened yet and possibly wont happen anytime soon. SO guess what I deal with it.. I was told that I ask for everything.. Ok just because I said something in cute does not mean I want it.. Yes, It would be nice to actually have new clothes that I have not had for years but no that wont happen.. I deal with what I have. Do I want to get out and get a job yes just so i can get away from here. But what then I still wont have money because I have to help with the household expenses while She does nothing because her back is hurt. I hurt to but then again i am told its NOT ALWAYS ABOUT ME! Story of my life.. Nothing is never about me! Can i be put first before anyone else even a dog? No I am last when it comes to everyone!
That is why the post title today.. I feel that love came with a price tag and honestly. The thing is what can you do to change it or fix it when it comes to this point! Enough ramblings for the moment.. I will be back later!
Hello September. The leaves start changing as the fall air sets in. You are a welcomed change. Hopefully you will not disappoint to much! August you will not be missed nor will the roller coaster of emotions. Though I am sure I will have my fair share of them in September as well! It seems that it is going to be another month like August but one can only hope not. I know i have to keep my thoughts positive and my head held high and see how things work. So I guess I will have to try that. I guess things are just not ever working out for me and what I want.. I mean really is this the way September is supposed to be?
Though this month I do plan on blogging more than I have been and getting back to my roots. Not letting anyone stop me from what I want to do or blogging about what feels right! I have gotten away from what I like doing only because I have let other people tell me what to do.. No More! With that I will go and I hope to see more of you!
Thinking Out Loud – I wish I could actually say how I feel to people and they actually understand it! Thinking back on the past and how things went and how you felt.. It is something that you can never forget no matter what lies ahead for either of you. Do I think things could have been different? Yes, but things happen in our lives for a reason and honestly sometimes you have to go with the flow of things.. Though sometimes you want to go back and change the past and you realize that you can’t.
How I feel about all of that takes a toll on you every single day. Especially when you loved someone and yes they loved you back. But they were not willing to give up one thing! It is something that tends to play the what if game with your mind and heart! It seems to make you wonder would things have changed and you would have been able to be with the one person or would it still be a constant battle. Though sometimes you can not live that battle of what if, especially when you know that it was never meant to be. I wish somestimes you would just understand this and know how I feel. I can tell you so many times but you will never quiet get it. I can’t help you lead your double life!
You know as May ended, I realized that I never really finished the blog challenge and that seems to be the normal thing with me at times. I get busy and not able to blog as much as I want to.
I don’t know why though. It starts off well and then in the end I never end up finishing things. Photo challenges are the only ones I tend to do but sometimes not even those. So i think I will do challenges at my own pace. It seems to be the best way to do it well for me anyway!
So maybe what I think I am going to do is just do posts when I can do them and try and start blogging at least a few times a week and do things as much as I can!
Caring for others seems to be about the only thing that I do anymore. I mean I take care of everyone, but honestly you get used to it! You ignore what you want and need and put everyone else before you! Ignoring how you feel about everything and putting others before you! Not having the money to do anything on your own especially when you lost your job in order to take others to Doctors appointments!
But what can you do. It is part of life as well as something you seem to get used to anymore!
Let me see what was the last piece of real mail that I actually received. Thinking about it, I really do not get any mail unless it is junk mail or something like that. The last piece of real mail I received was a letter from my brother and my host packet for the Color Street Party I am having. You can click on the link to order from the party.
For those who are not sure what Color Street is. It is actually pretty Simple to do.. It is Nail Polish Strips that take a few minutes to apply and last up to 14 days! They are amazing! Especially for those who have a problem with your polish chipping after 1 day of wear.
I really do not get mail. So i am ok with that. Though sometimes I miss that letter from your friend that comes in and you can sit down and tell them about everything!
My favorite clothes is anything leggings and a tank top. Though I do love wearing skirts or dresses.. Heels forget it. I am comfortable in slip on shoes or flip flops. Yes I am the girl who can wear flip flops all year long! As long as i am comfortable i am ok.. I do not do jeans to much but if I have to wear them then i will.. I do not like to feel trapped when i wear a tshirt so it better be baggy so i can actually move. I know i am picky when it comes to what i wear. Hell who isnt really. you want to be comfortable.